© 2019 by Ashley Smith & Milagro Midwestern Spa Collective

  • Ashley

the hardest question to answer, apparently

We recently added a question to our New Client Form that is really throwing people for a loop. It quite literally stops people cold. They usually read it out loud, and then look quizzically at us, as if they have NEVER thought about it before. Are you ready for this major stump-er?


“What do you do for yourself, to maintain balance?”


That’s it. That’s the question 99% of our guests cannot answer. We’re so glad we’re asking it.


There seems to be a serious issue with how we view selfishness, self-care, and taking care of others. We need to find that nice, healthy area between a self-centered life and living the martyr’s life, and we need to live in that area. Working 80+ hours a week to provide remarkable opportunities for your family is admirable. Filling your children’s schedules with stimulating activities so that they can become well-rounded little people is awesome. Finding time in your day to care for your own soul is not selfish. And should not bring about voices of guilt.


Every major religion or spiritual practice encourages rest. At some point, in our quest to live a generous life and positively affect those around us, we must commit to nurturing ourselves. We each have a unique story, perspective, and insight to offer. If we don’t purposefully take the time, on a regular basis, to turn the focus inward and to develop & grow who we are, the world may miss out on our unique contribution. If 100% of our day is spent operating on auto-pilot, jumping from one obligation to the next until we collapse into sleep, only to wake and do it all again, what are we really accomplishing? Who are we really helping?


Your response to this post may be, “easy for you to say”. But we’re just planting this seed in your head. We’re giving you permission to ask for help from the people around you. To say “no” to something that you just can’t do. We’re the voice in your head, battling all of the others, telling you to find time for you.


Be nice to yourself. Show grace to yourself. Sometimes that’s the best thing you can do for others.